z
A
N
D
z
If I were to write
I'd account about my Life
and Friends
Z In Skinny
I am half of this blog and out of the country.
Having life out of my course with friends and the other Z ,
and accounting bits and pieces that I would seldomly oversee in this blog .
Eyes for sense of style, colours and proportion to the slightest inch.
Personally fond of detailing.
Zafiruddin Abd Rahman
Create Your Badge
A good pair of JEANS will take you far
...with a good pair of SHOES
Wednesday 24 February 2010
Calm down!
He was doing his work so calmly, that I thought he needed to submit the assignment probably tomorrow. Usually medical students need to submit assignments to the undergraduate office before 3 pm. If you don't make it on time, any grades that you get will be marked down. That's why I usually submit my assignments couple of hours before or at one time I submitted it a day before.
It was 2.50 pm on a fine Wednesday afternoon, and suddenly a group of girls came to his computer to help him out. He was completely unsure about stuff, like what should he be printing out, which form to be included and stuff like that. He was still printing out his assignments. And when he's done there was an error of the layout so that he needed to print another copy. It was 2.53 pm.
He started to panic although I could hardly tell. Maybe he's a really calm person or he's just couldn't be bothered. If it was me, I would totally turn mad and shouting like a crazy person. One of the girls shouted calm down, it's gonna be ok. We have 7 minutes. 7 minutes? KIDDING RIGHT?
All of the girls helped him to compile his assignments together while he signed the form that he needed to submit to the office. At 3.58 pm they shouted go go go RUN! He made it at 2.59 pm.
OMG. I was gasping my breath for the whole 10 minutes. In my mind I told myself he's not gonna make it. He's not gonna make. But I was surprised he made it. It's true how we can be so efficient in such a desperate time. We would do things unthinkable to our mind. But from what I saw, there's completely no point to panic. If you calm down throughout any difficult or desperate times, for sure the end results will turn out way better than if you panic.
So the moral of the story...CALM DOWN!
Tuesday 23 February 2010
What are you looking at?
But seriously who are they?
I've been thinking about this matter for a while. Part of it came from my little thoughts but part of it always came from the cheesy cheap glossy gossip which I always get myself updated especially on hillariously laughable Malaysian celebrities. Apparently they always mention "orang di luar sana," "orang sibuk bercakap," but seriously people who are those people? Sometimes when it comes to big names like Siti or Siti (is there any other bigger names than Siti?) probably it would make sense but when it comes to celebrity with reputation of peanut-sized or profile of less than one face of an A4 sheet filled, it is just intriguing. Who the hell actually talk about them? Maybe there is people or orang di luar sana. Oh well. I'm confused.
But my point is we do actually care what other people (whoever they are) think about us. No matter how hard we try to deny the fact that we don't give a damn, or we just don't care but deep down inside we actually care. To be honest, I do care, maybe that's how I'm being brought up, to be able to carry myself properly in a socially acceptable way (again whatever it means).
These concerns undeniably have positive and negative aspects from them. What's positive that I can think of is that those imaginary rules ie rules on how you should behave yourself in a certain crowd, what you should wear, how you should look would make you well; behave. We couldn't deny there's always awkwardness and feeling out of place haunting us all the time but if we behave certain ways probably we can dampen them down.
But negative sides to it, if we excessively pay attention to those what-people-might-think nonsense we could ended up in trouble. We could be highly conscious of ourselves, awkward and constantly giving ourselves a hard time. We could possibly slip to the extreme end, ended up doing everything for other people instead of ourselves. And seriously, these people (whoever they are) could be that powerful.
We are in a world where we carry ourselves according to what other people might think of us. Obvious example is dressing or fashion. I'm saying this because it's related to me as well. Whatever I wear I can't escape from asking myself back again is it okay. Not for me but is it okay for the people out there. I don't even know who they are but I couldn't help to get their nods for whatever I've put on. And I just feel ok since maybe I've been brainwashed that it is a right thing to do. It's true I guess that I read somewhere that we are living in a world where we constantly feel like it's an obligation to please people whom we don't even know or we don't even like. I am not even going to mention about make-ups, expensive designer dresses, shoes, jewellery, designer bags, or what other "tools" to please the people.
Probably I am one of those "people" without realising it. So I guess it's just like a circle. You think of that about some other people, maybe some people over there are making up something about you.
But sometimes, when it gets too overwhelming, and you feel like people are staring, not looking, I guess it's probably right to do this
You wanna piece of me?
Say what you want about me
Seriously? I thought you said earlier that we are not required to go but suddenly you sounded like we really have to go to this clinic. At least ask not dictate!
I've set my mind that I want to go to this teaching this afternoon and suddenly there's clinic. Although you stated from the beginning it's optional but when I said I'm not interested then why you gave me this look and created an atmosphere like I couldn't care less. Oh please. Just hate me judge me say what you want about me. I'm not going. As it was an OPTION. So don't make it a big issue if I didn't want to go. My supervisor said it's fine so back off.
Sunday 21 February 2010
Stop & Stare
I have few goals that I want and I need to achieve by the age of 30 .
My mum and some of my friends have been urging me to apply for jobs here , however i am procastinating so much and I am being so pessimistic about my chance of getting a job . Hearing about other people getting turned down by employers have been pretty discouraging . However , if I do not try I will end up with " What if...".
Another thing that I'm not sure of is why I want to work here . Is it because I really want to work here or just for the plain reason of getting away from my job that's waiting for me in Central Bank ? Is it because I am not ready . If this is the reason , then what makes me think that I'm ready for a job here ( if I get it ) .
Life's all fun and joy but there are times when you need to sit and think . What do you want ? What do I want ? What should I do to get what I want ? Sorting these things is not easy . Some drastic changes need to be made . As cliche as this may be ,
"Allah tidak akan mengubah nasib sesuatu kaum , melainkan kaum itu sendiri mengubah nasibnya"
Labels: Thoughts
Friday 19 February 2010
Conclusion
However , from my analysis of my eating pattern . I tend to have one main meal . Be it dinner or lunch . Like on Tuesday I had Nasi lemak for brunch and for the rest of the day I didn't eat much .I would have the occasional snacks and have a quick meal for dinner like Stir Fry noodle .
At the end of the day when I think about what I've eaten , it's not much actually . So where does the problem lies ? I think it's due to my unhealthy lifestyle . Even though I don't eat much , I still don't move around much to burn those calories . I basically just sit at home , lie down , read books , do homework and sleep . Even the walk to the kitchen takes less than 1 minute , and my room is practically a box . Obviously those food go straight to the thighs!
Therefore , I have changed my route to school . I now take a bus to Liverpool Street and then I have to walk about 15-20 minutes to school and the same route coming back . It's not much but i've got to start somewhere . Maybe after this I can walk to the next bus stop to catch the bus instead of waiting at the stop in front of my house .
Labels: Food Diary
Thursday 18 February 2010
Owh
Wednesday 17 February 2010
Taste
It's just who you are .
Either you have it or you don't.
You can try to copy , but you'll fail.
Labels: Thoughts
Tuesday 16 February 2010
"You are great son! I don't think I can myself handle that kind of writing! You make me feel so proud of myself too..."
How this simple comment meant a world to me.
Is it me? or is it you? or anyone else?
I wasn't really thinking about myself at that time since I knew he was such a great teacher and probably a great person and I could live with it for another 2 or 3 hours (although it's hard not to breathe) but I was just worried that the patients or the nurses or other colleagues would notice it. It must be humiliating for him. This kind of issue people would definitely talk behind you right? And it's a hell of a sensitive issue!
I know we've been talking about BO since we were like teenagers but I still couldn't believe that adults still have to have this kind of issue. In my case how could he possibly not notice himself? Oh well. Maybe we do have different sense of smell.
But maybe you're alright with that but please...people around you are suffocating.
Monday 15 February 2010
Cumi Cumi
Sahur : Chilli Paratha
Dinner : hahahahahah
Liana found this offer , 2 for 1 at various Malaysian Restaurants . I was not gonna give it a pass! Haha..so after lecture , we went to Melati Restaurant . So there's 2 Melati , one in the heart of SoHo and another one near Piccadilly Circus . We went to the one near Piccaddilly . The place was rather dim and somewhat romantic . Though I'd stick to the place being not well lit.
Because of the offer , we ended up ordering more than what we'll usually order. We had starters , main course and we ordered Cumi Cumi Istimewa and Ayam Bumbu to share . The chicken was quite spicy but we all loved it! But my favourite was the Cumi Cumi ; squid with potato stuffed in the middle . The sauce that came with it was just delicious! Worth every penny ! For my main course , I had Char Kuey Teow which was also quite nice .
When I got back , I ate another chunk of my brownies . As I am typing this , my stomach is sooo full I think I am gonna go to sleep soooooooooooooooon! Hopefully I'll eat less tomorrow , though I am thinking of using the voucher to go to another restaurant.hahahaha.
Labels: Food Diary
Reading seriously
Maybe I have got my study style that everything now seems to be effortless but sometimes it's hard to forgive myself whenever I'm unable to answer a question properly or I seem not to remember anything that I've encountered before. I always thought if I work a little bit harder I might be able to answer this and that and so forth.
Is my brain deteriorating? Or maybe it's just that I'm not using it properly so it prefers to deteriorate or I just couldn't be bothered. I need to be bothered.
Maybe however comfortable I am now, I just need to realise that I'm not there yet although I'm nearly there. I don't want to mess things up at this very crucial final year in my life. Maybe I'm exaggerating but undeniably, this degree means everything to me right now.
I just need to find the spark back to work hard enough up to a level where I won't feel worthless when I'm unable to answer a question just because I know I've done enough work.
But at the moment I'm not happy with the progress I'm making.
Sunday 14 February 2010
Uncomfortable
I have never been like 'skinny' skinny . I've always been average and sometimes overweight ( this was waaaaaay in the past ) . Anyways , eating all those 'small' portions makes me feel rather uncomfortable . I guess it's only natural that when you eat more than you're accustomed to you feel rather uncomfortable . I really dislike it . Plus , I don't know if this is true ( and seriously , I still want to believe this even if 100 people tell me it's not true ) , but your stomach expands and contracts according to the amount you eat . Meaning , if you eat a lot everyday your stomach will actually become 'bigger' so you need to eat more before you feel full and vice versa . Okay , this really scares me . What if , all these small portions make my stomach 'bigger' and i'm not even in Malaysia . Am I gonna be size 32 ? SHRIEEEEEEEEEEEEK!
So , I have decided ( inspired by another blogger ) to have a food diary . Starting from 5 am today , I will document my food intake till Friday . What I hope to achieve from this diary is just to analyse my food intake and see where the problem lies . Maybe I can learn more about me . Who knows . Hopefully , by keeping a diary of my food intake I will be more aware of what goes into my mouth and hence keeping me in check .
Labels: Food Diary
I was once...A bad cook
I was once...A bad cook.
If people who are close to my family and especially to my mother, they would totally by now picking up their jaw from the floor. Come on people, seriously close you mouth. It's not nice. Simply because all of us know how such an amazing cook she is, everything in her hands will turn into a sumptuous dish. It's just like magic. And I'm not bias here just because I'm her son. She doesn't just nourish us with all the food, but slowly teach us to develop a complex ability to distinguish good tastes in a simple plate. I heard this story quite a long time ago and I couldn't believe it myself either. But during the last phone call I just wanted to refresh the story in my head.
She grew up in a typical Malay family, totally unsure about herself whom one day will become an expert in cooking. From her, she said it was typical that the daughters usually help the mother in the kitchen. The day always started early for them as she said back then it wasn't anything like today with all the spices are ready for you to just mix them, they had to make everything from scratch. Like they had to crush the chilis until their hands would turn red and hot, and had to prepare the chicken right after it was slaughtered.
Back then she was far from an expert. One fine evening, my grandmother asked my mother to add a pinch of salt into a pot of mung bean porridge (bubur kacang hijau) to enhance the flavour of the coconut milk. And my mother, being naive and inexperience just added the salt and had a taste. There was still not enough she thought. She then added more and more and thought she's done a great job. By dessert time, my grandfather just simply commented "ni bubur ka? Ingat gulai tadi' (this is porridge? I thought it's curry). By all means, that porridge was meant for dessert and it should be sweet, but my mother just made it too salty just like curry. Right after the comment boy she cried so bad, thinking she was terrible in cooking when my grandfather just meant for a joke. (Although it was salty).
My mother went into a boarding school in 1972 for 6 years until 1977 and therefore she missed quite a considerable amount of time of learning in the kitchen with her mother. But she always helped whenever there were school holidays. But she said she picked up basic skills, and remembered a few recipes by simply watching my grandmother cooked.
With just well-above basic skills in the kitchen she then married my father in 22 April 1980. And this time, she never looked back into her just then satisfactory cooking skills. It wasn't cheap as a newly married couple to live in a big city, and eating in was the cheapest way in adjustment to their modest salaries at that time. But that moment of her life was proven to be the highest peak of her evolving into a brilliant artist in her own little kitchen. She taught herself recipes after recipes, she asked my grandmother about the basic traditional recipes, she read food labels for their ingredients and she's done all sorts of things to tirelessly put them together and produce a fine dining experience in our own world.
However, she couldn't escape from having to experience lowest point in her cooking. Like there was this one day, she felt like making 'karipap' (curry puff). She's done with the fillings which she herself thought it was delicious, she then wanted to make the dough. Although she vaguely remembered how to make it, she just went for it. She recalled that my grandmother used to pour in warm oil into the flour and mix them. She channelled all her energy into making the dough (it's hard work I tell you) without realising she actually needed to mix in butter and water together to make the dough soft. When the dough (with just oil and flour) was done, she made the karipap. When my father was back from work, she fried and served them proudly. Unfortunately, they couldn't even make the first bite, as they're all so hard. My father as the most non-judgemental husband on earth just commented 'keras ni tak boleh makan, takpalah' (it's hard, we couldn't eat them, it's ok) attempted to praise my mother for her effort. Again, my mother broke into tears, simply annoyed after so much work she had done although my father just didn't mind. She's just annoyed. Then all of the karipap went straight to the bin. But that didn't stop her there. She asked my grandmother again, she learned, made them over and over again and up till this point, all I can just say; she makes the best karipap in the world.
This story may be just a fraction of her wonderful life, but I learnt a lot. She gave us the sense of perseverance, to not just give up. She went through ups and downs, her bins used to be filled with food that didn't turn out well, but she never ever give up. And if we make a little effort just to ask people who know better, just to add on to what we have, the end-product would be nothing but great. She always says just learn, maybe natural talent plays a tiny bit, but when you learn and work hard, you'll soon be there. From her story, there's nothing else I could say but to just agree. She also just loves to cook. I think when you love something you will just go on doing them. Do what you love, love what you do!
From her hard-work it's obvious that she had gained success in our own standard. From someone who used to make salty dessert, she could now simply and humbly cater hundreds of people without even a slightest complaint from the people she served. And I am still learning from the best, hoping to slowly master her recipes and imitate her creation of fantastic gastronomic experience that is beyond imagination.
To me, although this is probably just a household success story but it means a whole world to us a a family. As with her, we don't just eat, she taught us all about quality and about tastes. She will not cook certain food if there are missing ingredients. In that sense I learnt that although perfection is not always possible but I should attempt to at least to be close to. And to her, there's no such thing as food to just eat, it's more than that.
Therefore she could tell us all now to no ashamed,
"I was once...A bad cook, but look what's on your table now."
Love you mama.
Labels: I was once
Friday 12 February 2010
Bread Caramel Pudding
Labels: Food
Thursday 11 February 2010
100
Back in August before I came back to the UK at the end of summer holidays, I was looking for an everyday, casual pair of shoes. Realising most of the shoes I bought (although not that many) are absolutely my treasure which mean I couldn't wear them that often, I realised I had no shoes to wear everyday. I need shoes which I don't even have to care about them being scratched, or them being stepped by other people. Shoes that I don't feel too much of a statement or perhaps I don't even have to feel like I'm wearing one. I need a 'I don't care' shoes.
It was my last outing with Zaril for the summer that we went to Pavilion for our berbuka as well. A day before, I got an advanced duit raya from my beloved grandmother (love you much Maktok). I got RM100. So I thought it's not worth changing into Pounds so why not I just find something that worth RM100. After we had out meal, I told Zaril what can I get for RM100 in Pavilion. I swear he laughed so hard. So off we went hunting for anything really worth the money. I thought I've had enough tops or enough everything that I can get for RM100. It was a dead-end.
But suddenly he told me you've always wanted a Converse why don't we go and see them? I was the one this time who doubted his idea. Of course, since I saw converse in UK starts from 35 Pounds and if my maths was right that's like more than RM100 for sure in KL. But there's no harm to just go and see right? So we went to the boutique (is it a boutique or simply shop). I just couldn't be bothered to ask for the price but he did. And apparently the basic range of converse which I've always wanted were only RM99! Are you kidding me? I took five pairs. How I wish. I bought one pair with that money.
And how glad I was and I am still glad to own this pair of shoes. If not because of my Maktok I wouldn't have thought to own one (how dramatic). I think in this case it's totally, 100% money well-spent. I'm going home this summer and I'm hoping to buy more in every colour. Here they are a bit expensive I tell you.
I'd never thought shoes in that price can be of that value. Another perfect example of price is not everything. And plus they go with almost anything. I've reached miles with these shoes and more miles to come. Love Converse.
Labels: ShoeSStory
Are we human? Or are we dancers?
My supervisor is a super nice guy. He's friendly, not really fussy, understanding and very very cool. He told me from the first day I was fully in-charged of my timetable, I am an adult learner, so just manage my own learning. And he said I won't be expecting you to stay 9-5 everyday. Nice!
But however cool or however loose my supervisor was, I couldn't help from feeling a little bit terrified or intimated whenever I had sessions with him. I always have this kind of feelings when I'm the least confident medical student, I have the least medical knowledge and I just couldn't speak when I'm with certain people. Let say my consultant, in this case, he's super brilliant, as like he knows everything, and how dreadful to be around him and even worst, to be asked questions! Sometimes I was asked just simple, basic questions but thinking that he's my supervisor and he's going to assess me and circle my performance in that bloody green form, I always ended up over-think, over-conscious about my answer and suddenly I was mind-blocked. I couldn't really answer him properly, and I'd ramble on weird answers in layman terms. It's so humiliating. Especially when I was told to do certain skills in front of him I was like nervous all the time, suddenly I forgot how to insert a cannula properly. How hopeless I was. But when he's not around I did it perfectly, even got praised by the registrar, telling me it was perfect! Oh gosh.
Oh well, as we talked along about my performance for the last 6 weeks in the final hour, I totally expected everything he's going to say. He said my knowledge is still patchy (which I totally agree) especially on basic clinical knowledge, but in some areas my knowledge is excellent, well-advanced even more than the foundation doctors. I'm at both extreme ends. The assessment turned out well, way beyond my expectation.
However, I couldn't help to feel a little bit upset, as like I said, when my performance depended totally on what he saw, or what he thought, I just think he didn't see my full potential as a medical student or a future doctor. The assessment was just based on the time I spent with him which was just like once a week. And sometimes I'm sorry but the questions that he asked were a bit random!
But part of it is true that I still have gaps in my knowledge, but not being asked about what I do know is a little bit annoying. It's just a matter of right question with the right revised knowledge that I got at THAT time. The more I learn, the more I don't know, and to get asked about the don't knows is something. I guess that's the way you learn - by not knowing. But being asked question after question unfortunately revolved around that GAPS in my knowledge, will turn out to be not that decent in my performance sheet right? Agree?
It takes so many different aspects to be able to deliver when you are being put in the spotlight. Knowledge is definitely, whether you've came across anything similar before, the confidence, the ability not to be intimidated by anyone, the ability to control your voice to not be squeaky, and to just say the answer out loud. To put all of those together within limited period of time is just nerve-wrecking. People could just drop dead to be put in that so much pressure.
Looking back, I do know now that:
1. I do have insecurities (who doesn't). I do feel intimidated at times, but I just need to get over it quickly. I do care what people might think about me. I do feel the pressure not being able to answer a question properly.
2. I need to be really certain on my foundation knowledge especially in basic definition, causes, types, and management of common diseases. We're always being pushed to advance our knowledge, knowing complicated diseases, complicated treatments. But after all, common things are common. Knowing more without forgetting the basics is hard, but I just need to do it.
3. I am human. I don't know everything and the registrar, consultants, or whoever won't expect me to be able to answer everything. If not they won't know what to teach me anymore.
4. I still have time. Medicine is a life-long learning but I still need to pass finals to be qualified. I still have time before finals.
Maybe now I can forgive myself. Maybe a long gap not doing any clinical work is getting its toll on me. But slowly I'll get there. Just listen to Take That's Shine - 'stop being so hard on yourself, it's not good for your health.'
I'm doing plastics next week!
Labels: Thoughts
Wednesday 10 February 2010
Eyes half-opened
Tuesday 9 February 2010
But I never thought...
I had to meet my consultant at 8.30 a.m. and put my alarm on at 7, and I needed to go out at 8.15 a.m. I always give quite sometime in the morning for me to wake up properly, stretch here and there, shower, do my morning regime, have a great breakfast (peanut butter and chocolate toasts remember?), update my twitter, and all that jazz. Just that I hate to rush.
But suddenly this morning I didn't wake up to my alarm. When I woke up I realised it's already bright and I was like OH NOOOOOOOOO. And the time.........7.59 a.m. Shoot me. Surprisingly, my mind was racing, tried to think what should I tell my consultant for coming in late and perhaps I could just go in like really late. Might as well, right? Just because I hate to rush, and I thought I'd never going to make it on time. But the good side of me gave me a huge slap to my face in an attempt to wake me up properly. What the hell was I thinking. Half a minute later off I went into the shower, lalilalila, dadidada, had my breakfast and what not and 15 minutes later, I was ready to go.
Although I got lost a little bit trying to find where the operating theatre was, but I made it almost on time, without a trace from my face that I was rushing, and my consultant was already there. Oh I made it! My hair might still be wet (oh it's short anyway) and I might not be waking up properly just yet but I made it! I never thought. I'm so proud of myself.
And then I got change, and ready to feel and put my 'I'm a medical student with the least amount of knowledge when my consultant asks me question' look.
Labels: Thoughts
Sunday 7 February 2010
Melt together
La Tasca
Fresh-baked bread with salsa and olive oil dip.
Fish, calamari and tortilla tapas
Main dish - seafood paella
Paella was a bit too much in the end. I got two sizes bigger. It's not funny anymore.
Labels: Food
Let's go to the changing room
Later this week, my hair contributed to this week's fiasco which i've bitched in my previous entry. I hope I'll grow over it with my hair growing with time. Give me two months.
On Friday night I was seating in front of my laptop as usual, wasting time as usual, surfing the internet as usual, blog-hopping as usual and later I watched American Idol as usual. I always paused in the middle of watching anything, when I remembered to download something. And this time I needed to download Mr Hudson's new album. I'm obbsesed with the song supernova and out of a sudden I wanted the whole album. As usual I opened 4shared.com to download it. I found the file then I resumed my American Idol video. Suddenly out of the ordinary, my usual life, I was warned that there's a virus in the file I was trying to download. I was about to delete it when suddenly my laptop went blank. I was dead.
OH COME ON. NOT THIS TIME! I HAVE AUDIT TO DO AND I HAVE POSTERS TO DO. HOW SHOULD I WATCH VIDEOS LATER HOW SHOULD I USE INTERNET LATER, NO INTERNET = NO LIFE AND I CAN'T BE LIFELESS UNTIL SUMMER AND I'M GONNA DIE. PLEASE PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I swear all of those were in my mind and as I watched my laptop went off in terror. Oh great. This is just perfect. I don't know what to do.
I went crazy carrying my laptop like a poor mum carrying her sick child to the clinic downstairs to my housemate's room. That's how hopeless I was. HELP ME!
The virus turned out to be really bad, it caused my laptop to be in constant restart mode (i'm not that technical so hey) and it won't go into the main window. My housemate attempted to get into basic windows but the virus was stronger than he thought. He thought he just needed to reinstall new windows. Luckily most of my files were in D drive so he could clear up C drive and put in new windows. Gosh..it was real bad.
Although I didn't mind for him to do anything to get my laptop back to life but I couldn't escape from being a little bit reluctant to change the whole thing. As a control freak as I am, I just like things the way they are. I like my shoes in the box like the first time I bought them, I'd keep my bags in the dust bag like the first time I got them, the plastic cover are still on my blackberry screen, and many other things, I just like to keep things the way they are so I can fell they are new all the time.
In this case, I couldn't stop thinking how if the windows are not suitable with my laptop, how if things go wrong and so many other how ifs. Sometimes change can turn into a disaster. But in the middle of my over-conscious brain interpreting the situation like there's no tomorrow, I agreed for him to do whatever that needed to be done. There you go. Just like that.
When it's done, it wasn't as bad as I thought. All of my songs, pictures and other stuff in D drive were still there. Just it felt lighter. Maybe this time change is good. Yeah...sometimes change is good. Thanks to the virus, now files that I meant to delete a while ago had been deleted, viruses or spams among my files had been cleared out. There's need to change afterall. When I put this picture as my wallpaper
It felt just like before. But I knew it's even better since now I can start afresh, but I can still bring forward what's best of it from the last time, losing what I never wanted from the first place. Maybe things have to happen after all so that then I realise at some point I just need to change to get better.
To a more happy week.
Labels: Thoughts
Saturday 6 February 2010
Grand Roasted Stuffed Chicken
I followed the recipe as best as I could . Made sure the rice did not overcook on the stove or chicken burnt in the oven . Overall , I would rate it 6 out of 10 . The chicken turned out great ; juicy and tender . However , there was something missing in the rice . Still figuring that out . Nonetheless , I will be trying out more recipes in the future and will share the outcome in this blog . Have a great weekend y'all !
Labels: Food
Friday 5 February 2010
I was once...
Known as sha the cutest, funniest, craziest friend. She's my big brother's gurlfren so hey back-off! Haha. She says:
I was once...A Possessive Person
I need to know more story behind this. I'll write more. Maybe it's inspiring or maybe it's and out-the-window story but whatever it is it's a story. We learn this way better, like people in the pass they didn't have whatever we have now so they kill time by telling story. We'll learn a lot about friends, about family and about anything.
Sha were u possessive? really? because from twitter and blackberry you're like Possessed! Ops. No harm intended.
Labels: I was once
I was once...
I was once...A Fat Person.
Come on you can do better than I was once...a Showgirl.
Say it. Say it. Say it out loud. I say hey!
Labels: I was once
Please la
So the moral of the story, enough clothes won't hurt. Especially to Friday prayers!
Labels: Thoughts
Kickstart my morning. My way.
Not just that, breakfast is the best thing that can happen in the morning. How I just love to have breakfast. Back at home I always force myself to get up early in the morning so that I can catch up breakfast with my mum. To me this is an important part of my life as during breakfast my mum and I always talk and share, and tell stories together. Sometimes during weekends my dad will usually join us and things can't get any better. It's nice to sit down and talk during breakfast as everyone is fresh, and relaxed and in KL, at midday we can always go mad as it's so hot, our brains r boiling.
Here in UK I always try not to miss my breakfast. Although I can't get the sumptuous, and mouth-watering lontong or roti canai or nasi lemak or ok stop it, for breakfast here, I still quite enjoy it. I'll have breakfast alone, or with other housemates, or with my friends who come over to my place. My friends they know how i'll shout at them to wake up in the morning to have breakfast with me. As I say in the morning everyone is rationale, and nice to talk to. Haha.
If i'm not so lazy i'll make something nice for breakfast like boil the sausages and make scramble eggs or something like that. But usually i'll settle with cereals or toasts. And of course a nice cup of coffee.
I think my way of making my toasts r quite special. Really? maybe. Oh who cares. I always spread the peanut butter and chocolate first, as if like making a sandwich and then i'll put them in the toaster. Normally people would put anything after the toast is ready rite? This way the chocolate and the peanut butter will melt when you eat while it's still hot and the bread is done just on the outside. So you still can enjoy the softness of the bread on the inside and the crunchiness of the toast outside. So u get the best of everything that two slices of bread can offer. Haha. I'm obsessed. I've been making this toasts since I was in second year, and now i'm in fourth year, it gets better and better. And my friends seem to enjoy it too! So i think it is that good.
It may sound nothing but to me this little bit of things will make my life a little less than perfect as a good kickstart in the morning will determine a good rest of the day. So i'll enjoy it while i can.
Thursday 4 February 2010
Force Of Nature
Of late , I have encountered few events where I realise just that . The first time I encountered this I was rather puzzled . I felt quite embarassed of myself for trying so hard to create the connection . Till today , everytime I recall how excited I was in trying to forge the friendship I feel so ashamed . I still don't understand why the friendship never took off .
Recently , I had another encounter with this particular person . We went to watch a musical with a mutual friend and when he left for the gents it was such an awkward moment . We just couldn't hold a proper conversation . There's no chemistry .
Then it strikes me , there's nothing wrong with me and that maybe we're just not meant to be friends . That's why I keep reminding myself that never try too hard and if it's meant to happen it will.You'll never know when and where you'll meet new friends . Never in a million years would I have thought that I'll meet my BFF where we met!
Labels: Thoughts
It's snow time
That was the view from my room.
That was the first time this year Newcastle was covered in that white stuff. Then there was the second time, the third time and the fourth time which I couldn't be bothered to take pictures anymore. Up till this moment it's still snowing here, and I'm just tired cringing and tiptoeing all my way from the toilet into my bedroom since it's so cold. Owh well, some people might like it. But I don't think anyone will like when the temperature rises and the snows are all squishy and dirty and yucky.
Snow is nice temporarily. But snow or not I just still have to werq!
I say HEY!
A mere definition
Ok, to be honest some definitions r good and worth reading, but sometimes they just make me sick. Like the I just read, called The Zahir, it's full-packed with definitions and theories about this and that. I'm all philosopher now seriously. It's an amazing book anyway by the fact that the author approached big subjects in life in simplest way possible to be thought off.
I couldn't stop myself from taking this one out:
"Our true friends are those who are with us when the good things happen. They cheer us on and are pleased by our triumphs. False friends only appear at difficult times, with their sad supportive faces, when in fact, our suffering is serving to console them for their miserable lives." -Paulo Coellho in The Zahir.
We could agree or disagree with that statement. I'm not sure myself either. Or maybe this is just another one.
Just listen bitch.
I got home from hospital, changed and off I went to cut my hair. I sat there, telling the guy I wanted a slight trim, just get rid of the bits around my ears and my neck and just cut slightly the rest of my hair. I said clearly couple of times just slightly OK like half an inch! He was like oh yeah ok ok. That's fine.
Good thing he used just the scissors instead of that annoying machine thing. At first he was ok with the sides although he cut like really fast. I was getting anxious, like shit shit he's gonna ruin my hair. When he was just about to start on the top I reminded him AGAIN just a little bit yeah! He was like yeah I know. When he started I almost cried. I was doomed!!!!!!!!!!!! I couldn't even stop him since he was like possessed, blindly cutting my hair like he was holding a revenge out of my hair! I practically died at that moment. I was so annoyed since I've told him over and over again not too short you asshole!
When it's done he was smiling like he's done a wonderful job! I was so annoyed and running out of swear words in my heart. Demyuh! I got even more angry when he showed me the mirror to see the back of my head, I told him you were not listening, I told you not too short! He was holding his scissors and comb at that time and stupidly attempted to cut my hair even more, as if I wasn't satisfied that my hair was not too short! He is CRAZY!!!!!!! I was angry that my hair is too short now and you thought I wanted it even shorter. How delusional are you! He even asked me are you OK? You want it shorter?? Asshole.
Luckily I managed to put myself together and not rolling on the floor or jumping around like crazy witch yelling at him. I thought it's been done and of course he couldn't do anything much at this point. It's not like they can offer me free natural hair extensions ala Tyra Banks or Beyonce! I'm getting out of here u asshole! I tell you he is one crazy person.
Oh well, now my hair is short. I was standing in front of my mirror for like half an hour to figure out what styling should I wear starting tomorrow. I know hair will grow it's not a big deal but hell I'm angry that he wasn't listening to me! He was busy talking with his friends while cutting my hair like a possessed bitch! That's more annoying.
Whatever it is I'm still gonna have to WERQ this hair. What else should I do? Just WERQ!
Labels: Thoughts
They say a good pair of JEANS and SHOES
will make people talk about you . No ?
Saying much ? No ?
A good pair of JEANS and SHOES
links us together .
Links
Aliph
Zaff
link
link
link
link
Recent
+ Hacked By CyberFalconZ
+ Flashback
+ #11 On the way back
+ #10 Kudat
+ #9 Kinabalu Park
+ #8 Kota Kinabalu
+ #7 Pasar malam Melawati
+ #6 Lepat pisang
+ #5 Best lopis ever
+ #4 Zarra Sophea
Archives
+ June 2009
+ July 2009
+ August 2009
+ September 2009
+ November 2009
+ February 2010
+ March 2010
+ October 2010
+ December 2010
+ September 2011
Credits
designer  DancingSheep
Documenting Bits and Pieces
of things that matter
in life
Z In Slim
The other half of this blog .
Appreciates finer things in life ,
noting down all things that fascinates me .
Contrasting yet complementing style to the other Z .
Grey is my favourite colour .
Zaril Razak
Create your badge